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Real Sundays: A Weekly Journal - 2002
Real Sundays in 2002
* November 11, 2002 * November 18, 2002 * November 24, 2002
August 4, 2002 * August 11,2002 * August 19, 2002 * August 25, 2002
September 2, 2002 * September 8, 2002 * September 15, 2002 * September 24, 2002 * September 30. 2002
October 6, 2002 * October 13, 2002 * October 20, 2002 * October 28, 2002
November 3, 2002
December 1, 2002 * December 8, 2002 * December 15, 2002 * December 22, 2002 * December 29, 2002 December 29, 2002
Okay, this is the second time I'm writing this, since something happened and everything I just wrote got erased! Argh!This week was pretty mellow. I might have said before that I don't really celebrate Christmas, so instead, my boyfriend and I just watched a lot of movies.
The best thing we did this week was Knotts Berry Farm. My boyrfriend's family made an affair out of it, and we went along with all his siters, brothers, nieces and nephews. It was a great day. I couldn't ride any of the rides because of my back (from the accident), so instead we spent a lot of time walking around, riding the train rides and other kiddie rides that didn't jerk my neck, and playing games. My boyfriend won me two stuffed animals, a monkey and a caterpillar. And I won him a Sponge Bob. His little niece, only seven years old, won two Sponge Bobs at the same game. She has a knack for winning! We went to a couple of shows and watched the kids enjoy themselves. It was a great day. At the end of the evening, I got sick, really nauseous. I'm not quite sure why, but at least I didn't throw up (even though it felt like I was going to.)
So, this weekend I'm taking it easy, catching up on movies, and of course, The Sopranos episodes from the first and second season. I've been trying to figure out which movie is my favorite, but I can never narrow it down to just one or two. I have a number of favorites, for a number of different reasons. If you're curious, they include (but are not limited to) The Matrix, Citizen Kane, The Godfather (I & II mostly), Shawshank Redemtion, Casino, Beautiful Mind, Galaxy Quest, Run Lola Run, The Professional, Harry Potter, and Dirty Dancing. I guess my taste in movies and music is as eclectic as me. : )
In the new year, may we all resolve to love more and judge less, especially ourselves. Thank you for embarking on these weekly journeys with me. I'll talk to you in 2003!
December 22, 2002
Well, finally this last week is over. Since the high school where I work is going on vacation for three weeks, this last week was rather hectic. It was a good week though, crazy as it may have been.Monday, I was at the high school, as usual. In the middle of class, I had to go to my car to get something I had forgotten. As I approached my car, I saw a man walking his dog (so I thought). But, from far away, the dog actually looked a lot like a pig! As I drew closer, I realized it wasn't a dog at all, but it WAS a pig! The owner said it was a pot-bellied pig, which I always thought were supposed to be small, but it's not, it weighed between 80 and 90 pounds! Anyway, I suppose it was cute, as cute as a pig could get. But man that was weird, seeing a pig on a leash. That's LA for you.
Later that same day, I was at the actor's union office and who did I run into but one of my best friends from childhood, Amy Stewart! We grew up acting together ( although she was usually the lead, and I was usually in the chorus). She's always been incredibly talented. Recently, in LA, she was a regular on a WB series. The show has been cancelled, but she was great on it. I had been trying to figure out a way to reach her and let her know I was here for a while, but now, I don't have to! Running into Amy is probably the best thing that happened to me all week! I can't wait to catch up with her!
Wednesday, my second class at the high school (the freshman English class) did a staged reading of a play that we'd been working on for three weeks. I am very proud of all of them. They forgot a lot, but they remembered more. And the coolest thing was when they messed up and figured their way out of the mess-up without really stepping out of character! I was wholly impressed by their efforts.
So, I finished off my last days of work before the holiday. Yesterday I stayed inside all day. I didn't go anywhere...(largely due to a cold that's tryin got get me! But it's not going to get me!)
I don't really celebrate Christmas, or Hannukah, or Kwanzaa, but to those of you that do celebrate, then Happy Holidays. To those of you that don't, may you enjoy this time of slowing down and being reflective on the past year. I do hope you all find the time to connect with your friends, or family, or your pets, anyone that is close to you and shares a bond with you. As our world is on the brink of war, please take the time to make note of what is truly important in your lives. And if you are against war, speak up and be heard, call the White House, call your government representatives, let them know. But most importantly, let those close to you know how important they are. Tell people you love them, you care for them, and you are thankful for their spirit and energy in your life. And to all of you reading this, I am thankful for your spirits and energies in my life.
December 15, 2002
Well, the week started out with a bang. I had one audition scheduled for Monday and then got the call that morning for another audition that afternoon! The first audition was for CBS who is doing an African-American Showcase, to "enlighten" those producers and casting directors of the incredible talent out there. I have mixed feelings about the whole thing, but in the long run, I'm glad they're doing it. The mixed feelings are as follows: On the one hand, one must ask the question, "Why don't they know about the African-American talent in LA?" - although admittedly, many of them probably do not have a lot of roles for people of color, so what reason would they have to interview them? (That, in its own right is a bit disturbing.); On the other hand, one must be thankful for the opportunity, and at least the attempt to be open minded, and allow themselves to take note of the "us." (But then, one wonders, is this a result of the pressure from the NAACP? If so, is this just a means of appeasing a large group of upset people of color, or is it going to really help actors of color get more work?) The questions are many, and most are unanswered. But who am I to deny an opportunity, which performing is, whether in front of casting director, producer, agent, whomever. Like I've said before, one never knows what the smallest audition can turn into.All that being said, my audition, I felt went really well. I am proud of the work I did, and that's all I can ask for. As for the audition that afternoon, it was for the television show "Charmed." I had one line and I went straight to producers. With that, you do your best, and chances are they're deciding more on a look than an actor. So, I did my best (which felt kind of corny afterward) and went on with my life. I'm pretty sure I didn't get the part because I haven't heard from them yet, but I'm glad I went in, they are a really nice group of people to read for.
The rest of the week was consumed with work. But two things happened that I do want to talk about.
I don't know if I'd mentioned this before, but every Wednesday night, I've been in a workshop called "Get Your Sh*t Together," aimed at artists who need to start making things happen for themselves. All in all its been a great workshop with an incredible group of people and teacher. Also, the materials will prove priceless in the years to come. So, this week was our last class and we were challenged with looking at several pieces of art and figuring out which ones were censored for a particular project. One of the images was a piece created by an African- American woman who was challenging an old stereotype by using her hand and some text including the word "monkeys." This, I was sure, had been censored, and when our teacher told us which pieces had been censored, this was one of them. What happened afterward is the part I'm upset about. An older woman (I'd say early 50's) asked why, while looking directly at me. Me, being the ONLY African-American in the room, proceeded to tell her that "monkey" has been used as derogatory term to describe people of African descent...but before I could finish she put her hand up in my face ( from across the table) and looked to the teacher to answer. Not that the teacher was incapable of answering (exactly as I was, by the way), but how dare this woman ask the question while looking at me and then put her hand up as if to shush me, as if I didn't know what I was talking about, when truly, I am probably the ONLY person in the room, who REALLY understood the reference. Yes, this older woman was probably Caucasian, but I will not make that assumption. All I know is that she was NOT African-American, and obviously quite unaware of how racist her actions appeared. Now, I realize it's possible I am over reacting, but the fact is, I felt it was disrespectful to me, as a person, and as a person of color. She made me so angry, that the rest of the class was un-enjoyable for me. I am glad I participated and that woman did not take that away, but I am dissappointed to discover that amongst us, ignorance and disrespect continues, and that there is a large number of people who are just plain unaware. So, the lesson to you and me, is to BE AWARE. For those of you that are used to the term P.C. standing for "Politically Correct," be re-educated now and understand that P.C. originally stood for "Politically Conscious," a statement quite different from the first. We, as human beings, should all make an effort to be conscious and aware of our actions and our words and how they may affect those around us. It's not to say that you can't be who you are, I'm not saying that. And if you want to, or don't mind offending people, that's fine too, but be AWARE, that's all I ask. Be concious of who you choose to be, what you choose to say, and how you choose to act.
On a more positive side, the other thing I wanted to talk about today is this wonderful woman Norma. Norma found me on the internet and put together a show called Words of Wisdom down in San Pedro. She asked me to participate, and I just wanted to say thank you and send a shout out to all the wonderful CONCIOUS people I met that night. Thank you Norma, Kowa, Sara Messenger and Will that read some incredible poetry, Uncle John, Da' Monsta Mob (www.DaMonstarMob.com), the dope young woman who got up and freestyled for like 10 minutes, Black Love Radiator, and all the people that came to support everyone. It was a positive evening of words, music, and drumming. I'm glad I was able to participate.
So today, I'm working on putting together a math review for the young girl I tutor, so she doesn't forget her stuff over break! Then, later, I'm going to see her in her church play. I'm excited about supporting her and her mother (who wrote the play), it should be a lot of fun!
Yes, fun, please, remember to make time in your lives for fun. May this week grant you at least one moment of fun. Until next week...
December 8, 2002
This week felt like a month. I am glad that it's Sunday and I have chosen (as I do most Sundays) to stay home and rest. I've found, that no matter how much I try, I don't truly make time to relax, to simply sit and rejuvenate. It is so important to our health and emotional stability to give ourselves this time, of reflection, or relaxation, and of focus on self. Even when I say I'm resting, I'm usually thinking about what I have to do later, or the next day, or the next week. My rest time has not truly been relaxing. It really hit me when my chiropracter told me that I wasn't healing fast because I wasn't really taking it easy, even when I thought I was. So, today, I am REALLY taking it easy! Hopefully you will give yourselves time to do that each week as well.So the week began quite normal, work at the high school, tutoring, and chiropractic visits. Tuesday, I had a great feature performance at Claire de Lune Coffee House in San Diego. The open mic venue is called Poetic Brew. Thank you to Marc for having me, and to all of you who came out and supported, and of course those who supported by way of purchasing the CD. It was a great evening of inspiring poetry and people. I'm glad I made the trip. Thank you to San Diego for making me feel at home.
The rest of the week continued along the usual lines, more work and tutoring! But at night, I was doing something very important....studying for the CBEST. The CBEST is first test for California teaching certification. With the CBEST and my degree, I can begin substitute teaching. So, the evenings were spent checking my reading comprehension and recalling the Pythagorean Theorem, the quadratic formula, and the rules of fractions (although "I've always been good at fractions..").
So Saturday was the test. They gave us four hours. I finished in about three. By that time my brain was so fried. I think I did okay, hopefully I passed. I'll find out in a couple of weeks and be sure to let you all know!
After the test, I had an exhibition slam with the Youth Poetry Slam Workshop at a youth Christmas party in LA. Although I was tired, I was glad to help spread the poetic word to the youth. But when I got there, I realized these were kids, like 5-10 year olds. I suddenly realized I didn't have any poems that they could really relate to. I didn't know what to do! I decided to do Super Woman, since it's about superheroes. I figured there was something in there that they could grasp onto. It went okay, but I left thinking maybe I need to expand my material some more. I haven't made enough time to write new stuff lately, and after yesterday, I know I must now make the time.
Then, the day was not over, I still went to my Playwright Writing Workshop, sponsored by the Robey Theatre Company. Even though I was even more tired, it ended up being a great class. The woman whose play we read, is writing a musical, so she had the music and everything! It was great, quite impressive. I can't even comprehend trying to write a musical! After that class, I came home and veged out in front of the TV, made dinner, and went to sleep.
Today, I had only one thing, okay two, things to do. First, I had a prelimenary interview with Spoken Vizions magazine. They are a spoken word magazine geared at letting the world know about spoken word. It went well. I have some more to do as far as the interview goes, but you can check out their website and maybe subscribe if you want at www.SpokenVizions.com. The second thing I had to do is write in my journal. Now that I'm done, I am going to rest.
I wish you all the best as the holidays approach. Remember to rest and relax and rejuvenate. It will help you stay healthy and keep your heads during this hectic time of year! Until next week...
December 1, 2002
Well, well, well, it is December already! Ahhhh! (That's a scream, not a sigh!). This week I took it easy, trying to heal from the car accident.Monday and Tuesday I went to work and the Chiropracter, then Wednesday - Friday I had off! Woohoo! Thanksgiving is always a weird holiday for me. I like to eat, cook, and be thankful, but then I can't help thinking about all the American Indians that died as a result of the pilgrim's deceit. So, I don't make any big plans. This year, my boyfriend's family invited us over to eat with them, a very, non-formal, relaxed situation where we could eat and enjoy being with friends and family. Thank you to his family for making me feel so at home, and for all the GREAT food! (The leftovers are long gone already!) I'm truly thankful for such kind people in my life. This year I didn't get to see my mom or my dad, or my other family, but my heart is with them. And congradulations to my cousin who just gave birth to twins, George and Frances!!!!
Saturday I went to my playwrighting workshop and had a great critique and discussion of this weeks play.
Then today, I woke up with a stuffy nose and a cough, but I am determined to be well. I go to a youth writing workshop to demonstrate slam today, so that'll get my butt out of the house! I am looking forward to working with the kids as well.
When I woke up this morning, Dr. Wayne Dyer's program "There is a Spiritual Solution to Every Problem" was playing on KCET. He reminded me of many things, but one that I'd like to share with you before I get ready to go, "What you think about expands. Your thoughts create your reality." And of course, don't forget to "row, row, row your boat, gently down the stream, merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily, life is but a dream!" Until next week...
November 24, 2002
It's funny. When I sit down each week to write, I can never seem to remember what happened during the week. But, during the week, certain things happen, and I think, "I should write that in my journal on Sunday." But then Sunday's here and I have no idea what the week entailed! So, now, I pull out my datebook, hoping that it will spark some of the memories so as to record them here!Well, last week I did forget two things.
First, I forgot to wish my friend Danielle a happy birthday. Her mother, Kelly, threw the best damn tea party at the Ritz Carlton! Thank you both (and Kenny) for having me there and allowing me to share in such a special event!
Second, I forgot to mention one of the poets that re-invigorated me from the Poetry Convention. His name is Dr. Herbert Woodward Martin. His work and performance left me speechless. I will find some of his work to tease you on my website, or I'll find a link to some. Okay, just had to get that in there!
So this week....Pretty normal stuff. I did finish up the interview with the PhD student, Maggi. Her dissertation has to do with folklore and how spoken word (the actual performance and sharing of words) plays into a community's traditions. At least I think that's the basic concept.
Thursday I went to order more CD's (thanks to the folks at the ISP Convention, I sold out for the first time!) Then, I was off to another meeting. So, I'm half way there when the woman in front of me stops to turn into a KFC. So, I stop behind her, and a few seconds later, the person behind me, REALIZES we were stopped. Unfortunately, she did not have enough time to stop. Yes, I was rear-ended and then pushed into the car in front of me. All in all, not pretty. So, work that day and the next were a no go. I am suffering neck and back pain, and my rear bumper is done, I can't get into my trunk....but I am walking, I have the use of all my limbs, and my brain (at least most days!) So, not all bad.
So Friday morning it was off to the Chiropracter, Dr. Cathcart. He is the best. I felt a little better after leaving, but I am looking forward to my treatment tomorrow, as the muscles seem to have tensed back up this weekend.
Yesterday, Saturday, was a productive day. I finally (two weeks late) made it to my playwrighting workshop through The Robey Theatre Company. Kim Yule is the artist in residence and she is great, very insightful. It's a small group, so there's a lot of time for discussion and working/critiquing each other's pieces. Then at the end, we did a writing exercise. I'm glad I got off my butt and am participating in something pushing my art forward. It's too easy to sit back and wait. But what am I/you/we waiting for? If you're not going to make it happen, then who? Luckily, with the help of my good old friend called Advil, my back made it through the four hour sitting session.
Then today, I went to demonstrate "Slam" for a youth writing workshop. Thank you to Jerry and Merilene for making it possible. I did a couple of poems and talked about Slam rules and it's benefits. It's fun to see the fire in the eyes of the next generation, knowing that they have the ability to explode with energy and insight on stage.
So that is my week. I'm home now, about to sit down to a Boston Market dinner and maybe watch Popeye (I've never seen the one with Robin Williams). May you all continue to be grateful for the moments that we have, with ourselves, and with others. Until next week....
November 18, 2002
Well, it is Monday evening, yet again. I am trying to recover from the fatigue of the week, but I wanted to make some time to write!Moday was a school holiday (Veteran's Day), so of course, instead of taking the day off, I did a million and one errands. First things first, I got my oil changed. I must keep the car running! Then, I went to interview with a woman who's doing her PhD dissertation on a subject involving Spoken Word. It was an interesting talk. We didn't even have time to finish, so I'm going back to talk with her later this week. One really nice thing about that is that she is from the south, you know, hospitality folk! So of course, as part of the interview, I had homemade hot chocolate and fresh corn muffins made special for my visit! I like that feeling of making a guest feel welcome and at home.
Tuesday was work work work. Then, my dear friend Glen ( www.gagnezlejeu.com) was in the process of completing his first book / manual "25 Ways to Earn $ Money $ as a Poet." So, of course, I spent many an hour this week helping him format and duplicate his self-published work. (By the way, the "Ways" really work, so if you're a poet, you should pick up a copy. This is not a shameless plug, but rather a call to those poets who need to learn how your art can support itself, and eventually you. Everything I have learned about putting together a chapbook and CD and selling products and earning money from my art, I learned from Glen!) Well, needless to say, I spent many a sleepless night this week working on the book.
Then, Friday, I went to a poetry convention (Glen's idea!). The convention was a once in a lifetime experience. Over at least 2000 poets (I think) attended. It was held here in LA and was packed with three days of workshops, seminars, symposiums, open mic's, a $ 20,000 poetry contest, and incredible people to boot. All in all, I did not (sadly) walk away with the $ 20,000. I did however walk away with a smaller prize (one of the top 10). But as many people voiced, the real prize were the people we met. I met some great poets and maybe some future friends. Not to mention selling out all my books and CD's! So, thank you to Glen, Sharmon, Suzanne, Phillip, Beverly (the 2 of you), Joseph, William, Jens, Lebo, K.G., Bolahan, Ed, Rhys, Vernon, Cameron, Adri, David, Angel, Glenda, Gi Gi, Dr. Herbert Martin, Aaron, Gary, Stephen, Nor, Ephraim, Paul, Essex, Teresa, Akilah, Kendria, and all those whose names escape me at the moment. You all made the weekend an incredible experience and the winning moment even that much more special.
So, now I will rest and put my life back in order.
I will pay the bills and spend less time on the border
of fear and action. I will make the choice,
to answer my calling and listen to my inner voice.May you all do the same. Find your purpose and may it be your passion.
November 11, 2002
Well, I had all intentions to write last night, but I got too tired. So here I am, Monday again, writing late. This week was rather uneventfull with a few exceptions. The first exception was being on the radio!On Wednesday, November 6th, I was on Jerry Quickley's radio show on KPFK. I was asked there as a participant of Lady Fest Los Angeles (the other exception to my regular week.). Brooke Olsen, the program director of Lady Fest, and I were on to promote Lady Fest's weekend long festival. All proceeds from the festival went to the East Los Angeles Women's Center. The radio interview went great. I read a poem and Brooke talked about the festival. I messed up a little, but hopefully not too many people noticed! The cool thing was at the end of the show we gave away four Lady Fest passes and four CD's and four books of mine. When Jerry said for callers to call in, the lines all lit up! People were listening! That was cool. (Yes, it's the little things.)
The rest of the week I spent putting together my flyers to pass out at Lady Fest (I try not to go to a show without something to hand out to people) and working (yuck!).
In the middle of the week I did get a chance to rent a movie and actually watch it! I rented "Heist." A film written and directed by David Mamet. All in all a great film, great story, great dialogue, great acting, and great direction. If you want to see a film that still has the "art" of film, in and amongst the "action" that sells so well, watch it. Listen and watch carefully, then watch it again. These are the kinds of movies that should get made...at least in my humble opinion.
P.S. And my boyfriend really liked it too! It has "man" appeal...
So Sunday came and I went to the Lady Fest show. It was awesome. When I got there, there weren't a whole lot of people there, but the crowd grew by the time I went up. Now I can say I performed in the legendary Downtown Palace Theatre. It's always cool to feel the history that exists in old, legendary theatres...as long as there are no ghost encounters! So, no ghosts for me, just legend energy. I did two sets and got a lot of love from the audience. A couple of people even said they came because they heard us on the radio!! Thank you Jerry! Thank you to Glen for selling my books and CD's and keeping watch over my mailing list. And thank you to all the ladies of Lady Fest, especially the organizers that have given me nothing but love since we found each other!
Then I came home and slept, slept, slept. This morning I went to get my oil (my car's oil really) changed and had an interview with a grad student working on her dissertation...but more on that next week.
Love and be loved. But even if you think you don't be loved, love anyway, 'cause you always be loved by the one who is love.
November 3, 2002
There's not too much to report this week. I spent the entire week convincing myself to make it to all of my jobs and not play hookey!Tuesday was my adopted little sister's birthday, Happy Birthday Lovely!
I started a workshop on Wednesday's that deals with grant writing and other ways to basically make it happen for yourself, instead of waiting for someone to do it for you. Most of the participants are fine and visual artists, but I figure there will still be something I can learn.
Friday I performed with other talented LA poets for an "industry" crowd. It was interesting considering most of them had never been to a poetry reading before. All in all I think we were well received. Thank you to Dufflyn and Gabriel for setting that up.
As I said, not too much happening. I have been spending a lot of time contemplating ways to become independently wealthy...I'm still working on that one!
Oh, and good news, I'm going to be on KPFK, our public radio station here in LA. and Santa Barbara. You can listen live on the internet at www.kpfk.org, Wednesday, November 6th, between 5:30pm and 6pm. I'll be promoting LadyFest Los Angeles and my upcoming poetry show with them. The host is a phenomenal LA/Ny/International poet, Jerry Quickley. It will definitely be an interesting evening.
So, I'll report to you next week...(especially when I discover the secrets of independent wealth! It's out there, I've just gotta find it!) Continue to feed yourselves, eat, read, learn, love, and open up to the possibilities.
October 28, 2002
Well, it's Monday again. I tried to write yesterday, but my hosting company was having issues. So here I am, early in the morning. First I wanted to add to some events that took place last Sunday, after I wrote. Of course it was closing night of For the Love of Freedom: Dessalines, Blood and Liberation. But the coolest part was that my mom came a second time and my boyfriend came to see me! It looked like he wasn't going to make it to the play at all, then at the last minute he made it! That was very special to me. Also, after the show, there were a few more people who had come to see me, and I didn't even know they were there. My friend, fellow poet and phenomenal singer, Gina Loring came out to support. And one of my trainers from a leadership program called CORO showed up. Thank you Craig for venturing out. Also, the celeb in the audience for closing was (drum roll) Jennifer Lopez! Ha ha, just kidding. But really, Glen Turman was there. He seemed to enjoy the show.It's interesting the way my views have changed about people coming to see the show. When I was young I wanted everyone to come, all my friends, teachers, family. I would invite everyone, and hardly anyone would show up. My mother is the only person who was always there, no matter what. In fact, I can't remember if any of my best friends in high school have seen me in a play, even a production done at the high school! It used to be so important to me and I would get incredibly hurt when people didn't show up. So, over the years, I developed the "they can't flake if I don't invite them" and "if they want to see me perform, they will ask" attitudes. So, now that I've arrived at the point where I will invite people once and let them do the rest, I am so ecstatic about those that actually showed up. It shows that they truly believe and support me in my art. I am still hurt by those that didn't show, but I don't hate them (like I used to when I was little). Everyone has their own path. The more we can allow others to be on their path, the more we can follow our own. So, to those friends who didn't make it, I still love you!
The evening ended with the cast party at a great downtown artist's loft! (Thanks Tamara!) There was great food, drink, music and people. I had to leave early though to start my week!
So, Monday, assited drama class in the morning. Then, because I hadn't gotten any color photos of myself in these great costumes hand made for me, I arranged a photo shoot before the set was striked. So Monday afternoon I spent doing make-up and hair as if I was in the play and shooting photos in my costumes. The pictures turned out great...I'll post a few soon.
Then it was off to Tower Records in Marina del Rey, to sign the papers for them to carry my CD! Yes!!! Tower Records in Marina del Rey has my CD on the shelf! How cool is that! Now the only trick is selling them! (P.S. If you live by there, swing by and pick one up!)
Then Monday night I performed at an all women's reading at "The Pig." It was a fantastic evening of moving words and belly dancing...you had to be there!
Tuesday, no much happened, work and normal stuff. Wednesday was the same.
Thursday I went back to training for the job I had put off. Honestly, I was dreading it, but once I was there, it wasn't so bad. Friday was also training, an even longer day. The good thing about this job is that we are raising money for good non-profit orginizations like Greenpeace. Saturday was technically my first day of work, although I spent time getting some extra training and learning about all the issues. I ended up having some people hang up in my face, and then having great conversations about the plight of the environment with others. All in all, not a horrible day. Plus, I went to see White Oleander with my friend Tegan. What a great movie of old fashion story telling. No action, only story and great acting. I really enjoyed it.
Yesterday was spent taking care of all the personal business that has lapsed in the last couple of months. I didn't finish everything, but I did get a lot done...along with watching two of three movies that came on TV. I took it as my day, to do whatever I wanted with no schedule. Everyone should do that every once in a while, if not every week. We should always remember to take some time for ourselves, to take care of ourselves, to treat ourselves. The love we have for ourselves only enhances the love we have for others.
So, now I must rush off to work. Love yourself first and the rest will follow. Until next week!
October 20, 2002
I suppose technically it is late late Saturday night, but it is after midnight so I decided to write. This week has been rather intense for me.Monday I spent the day on my boat (for those of you that don't know I live part time on a boat here in LA...I'll tell you more about that one day...). I was preparing the boat for my mother's visit this weekend. While I was there I heard some seals barking loudly. I wanted to see what was going on so badly that I bumped my head terribly, trying to pop my head out of the boat. Seals come and visit us on occassion, but not all the time. I think it's so cool when they're there that I always try to get a picture, but usually fail! Of course, at this moment, my camera was in the car! Anyway, I finally did see the seals, there were two of them, playfully barking and swimming and eating seaweed! It was nice to take a moment and share their carefreeness! Then it was back to work. Along with her, my mother was planning to bring boxes of my stuff that she has housed for apparently too long! So, I spent the rest of the day cleaning out my storage area and preparing it for more boxes that I need to sort through! Ahh stuff...why do we need things again? Then, later that afternoon I received the call that I had a second call back for Norman Lear on Tuesday! Woohoo!
Tuesday morning I went to my second call back with many other talented poets and a few actor / poets like myself. I felt good about my audition. We met the other producers, the director, and the writer. Coincidentally the director and I went to the same University (Wesleyan...) so that gave us something to talk about. Anyway, after the call back, they told us they would let us know by the end of the week. Okay, the end of the week, only four days (I have to count Tuesday because the audition was in the morning!)...I can wait, I have plenty of other things to keep myself occupied so I don't sit and pine over this job for the next four days! Yeah right! I tried very hard to let it go, let things happen, and just wait, but I was in a constant state of limbo all week. Nothing to do but wait, Friday, Friday, Friday.
So, Wednesday one of the teaching partners in the drama class that I work in brought in a great quote that I thought I would share here. Many of you may have heard it before, but sometimes, we need to hear things (or read them) more than once or twice, or even a hundred times. Sooo, thanks to Gary, here goes:
How To Be An Artist
Stay loose. Learn to watch snails. Plant impossible gardens. Invite someone dangerous to tea. Make little signs that say yes! and post them all over your house. Make friends with freedom and uncertainty. Look forward to dreams. Cry during movies. Swing as high as you can on a swingset, by moonlight. Cultivate moods. Refuse to "be responsible." Do it for love. Take lots of naps. Give money away. Do it now. The money will follow. Believe in magic. Laugh a lot. Celebrate every gorgeous moment. Take moonbaths. Have wild imaginings, transformative dreams, and perfect calm. Draw on the walls. Read everyday. Imagine yourself magic. Giggle with children. Listen to old people. Open up. Dive in. Be free. Bless yourself. Drive away fear. Play with everything. Entertain your inner child. You are innocent. Build a fort with blankets. Get wet. Hug trees. Write love letters. - SarkSomeone told me they saw this, or something similar to it in The Artist's Way, but this came out of another book by this women from Northern California by the name of Sark. For more inspiration (the page will continue to grow) you can visit my Influences and Inspiration page.
Okay, Thursday was a good day because I got a request for tutoring, so now I have a tutoring job in addition to all my other jobs! She's a sweet girl that needs some help in Math and Chemistry, and yes, I'm good at those...(I used to work at NASA for those that may not know... see how much you find out about me by reading this journal! I'll elaborate on that one day.) Then, Thursday night I had a poetry show with my 2002 slam team from Long Beach. The show was a part of the montly open mic' held at California State University of Long Beach. I have to say, they have some incredible poets of their own, it was a pleasure to read amongst them! A special shout out to Lethia and "Born Charles, Created Philosophy" who both purchased copies of the CD. I am always flattered when someone wants to take a piece of my poetry home with them! Thank you to you both. Also, while I'm at it, thank you to Lanray and Erin in the cast of Dessalines, that bought CD's just to support me, and then ended up really liking them! That's always cool too!
So we arrive at Friday...Friday...Friday. I waited until the afternoon and didn't hear anything. Okay, I had to know, either way, I had to know. I finally called another poet friend of mine who had sort of the inside scoop and he told me who they picked, and I was not one of them. At least not for now. Yes I was sad, but at this point, it was not in my control. They may add more people to the tour as they develop the show, and perhaps I will be one, but for now, I must go to my twelve million jobs and continue the pursuit of my art. So, I shake off the blues and get ready for closing weekend of my play.
So here we are, late Saturday night / early Sunday morn, and I only have one performance left. I'm sad in the way of not seeing all these people on a regular basis anymore, but I'm happy to feel like I can breathe on the weekends again. I get to handle all those little things that have sat by the wayside. Maybe even take a day off! But best of all, I get to see my mommy! And she got to see the show. Also tonight, my brother, Thyme Lewis, made it out as well. That was special. I think it's the first play of mine he's ever seen. So, thank you Thyme and mommy for making this closing weekend a special one.
I hope you are all well. I need to rest for closing night, and prepare for my work week ahead! Thank you to everyone that has supported me, it means a lot! Talk to you next week!
October 13, 2002
Well, it is late Sunday after my show. I have to get up in a few hours, but I really felt like I wanted to write, so I am. This week was full as ever.I told you last week that I had an audition Monday, well I did, and apparently it went well because I got a call back later in the week! And for my call back I had the opportunity to meet the incredible legend Norman Lear. (If you don't know who he is, look him up and then get back to me!) I felt the call back went well, but more importantly I got to meet Norman Lear! That was all that really mattered at that point!
Wednesday I was supposed to start a new job, which I did, but I had to leave early to get to the call back! Go figure. Then when I came to training the next day, I asked if I could put off the training just a few weeks until my play was done. I seem to feel too overwhelmed on the weekends with the play, much less having to work and start a new job during my last two weeks of the play! Luckily, they agreed that I would be more focused if I waited, so they were cool with it! Woohoo!
Let's see, oh yes, I registered to take the CBEST (the California teaching certificate test), so, once I pass, I can substitute teach (or maybe teach full time) to earn some extra money for all those actor things I need!
So we are up to this weekend. The shows went really well this weekend. Sadly, it was the last weekend for my friend Tamara, who alternates in her role. So, that was sad tonight, but she's been fantastic the whole run. What a talent! So tonight my good friends Ann and Locksley came, in addition to my acting teacher, Martin Barter! I was so excited to see them all. If felt good knowing that people who love me were watching. I think I forgot to mention last week that my father came down from Northern Cali to come see the show. It was nice of him to come down. It's funny that now that I'm older, he's actually making it out to my plays. When I was younger, he didn't attend very often, so it's special when he makes the effort. My mommy, though, rarely missed a performance, much less a show! The only show she's missed in my lifetime (remember I've been on stage since I was 11!) was my Off Off Broadway debut because it was so far. She's coming down next weekend to see this one. Yeah! Mommy!
Anyway, I'm tired and I need to sleep. So you all sleep well, play well, and love well! Talk to you next week!
October 6, 2002
Ahh a lazy Sunday afternoon recovering from last night's show (which was a good show by the way...) and updating my website. I hope this week treated you all well. Let's see what this week held for me. I find this journal has really helped me define where I spend my time. Because sometimes, I, cannot for the life of me pinpoint where I spend my time!Well, Monday morning I worked with the drama class and then met with some friends. My first friend, Jadah, needed help picking out her headshots. So we sat and looked over her proofsheets. She is a gorgeous woman! There were so many good ones! Then, I sat and had breakfast with another friend of mine Tegan. We really just caught up on each other's lives. We were in the play last year together, and are both in it this year as well. He's an incredible actor and so dedicated. It was nice to take that rare time out and just sit to catch up. (Of course we did discuss some business and how to start getting more paying work as actors. He gave me some good advice about seeking "generals" with casting directors. For those of you that don't know, a "general" is simply a meeting with a casting director where you usually talk about yourself and they see your incredibly charming personality and that they should call you in when they have a role for you. They are not always easy to get, and when you do get them, they're not always easy to do well! But it is an additional mechanism to use in order to meet casting directors that don't seem to call you in when they are casting projects!)
Tuesday and Wednesday were normal, not too eventful days. I did however get the call on Tuesday that I will start training for a new job next week. Good and bad I suppose, but I'm glad to have a job! I will work at this new job on Thursday's, Saturday's, and Sunday's. So, knowing that this Thursday was my last "free" day for a while, I took advantage. I didn't even leave the house Thursday. I stayed in and spent the day looking over all my acting footage, all of the television and film I've been in. I want to edit a new acting reel as soon as possible so this is the first stage, organizing the footage and the scenes, gathering it all into one place. This first stage of editing, reviewing all the material, is the most time consuming, not the actual editing! So, hopefully in the next couple of weeks, I will have a new acting reel! Woohoo!
Then Friday, I spent the day getting ready to get back into the play, it felt so long since I had performed! I got to the theatre early to check everything. Some of my props were broken, so I ended up spending some time mending them, thank goodness they were all fixable! The show went well for a Friday. And guess who came to see us? None other than the fabulous Mrs. Angela Bassett (I think she's still married.) Apparently she is an honest fan of theatre. I didn't get to talk to her after, but I'm flattered that she came. This is actually the second time she's seen me perform and that I haven't had a chance to talk to her! Shoot! Oh well, one day!
So all in all a good week. I have an audition next week, so stay tuned for more details on how I do! I hope you all stay healthy and happy. Remember, "life is what happens while you're making other plans!" - John Lennon.
September 30, 2002
Happy Monday! I hope everyone's weekend went well. I actually had the weekend off from the play because I wanted to give my understudy a chance to get a few performances in and have people come see her. I went to a special performance on Thursday where all the understudies and alternates performed. It was great, a very different experience watching the whole play versus being in it! I heard the beautiful Erica Clare (understudy for my role) did a wonderful job.So let's see, this week, what did I do? Hmmm...Oh yeah, on Monday I started working with the Arts Recovery Project (A.R.P.) with Greenway Arts Alliance. A.R.P. does outreach art programs. This semester I'm assisting (along with Gary) Lara Lyon with the drama class workshop at Fairfax High School. The class is great, they all seem very talented. We do theatre games, writing exercises, and eventually the kids will write their own show, compiling poetry, dance, skits, and monologues. It, so far, has proven to be fun and rewarding. Hmmm, maybe I should think about teaching...?
The other thing I did this week was audition for The Best New Talent Showcase. They advertised in BackStage West, and I thought, "Hey, I haven't done a showcase yet, maybe this is the thing I need to take the next step in my acting career." So I called. I auditioned on Friday with a very nice, honest young woman who seems to know what she's talking about. To my surprise, she called me back to meet the lead LA casting director. I left work a little early the next day to attend the callback, even though I wasn't sure if I was going to be able to participate in the showcase. (F.Y.I. A "showcase" is usually an evening of scenes and/or monologues with a number of "up and coming" actors who have had trouble getting seen. The showcase, in the best case scenario, is attended by LA casting directors, agents, and managers (maybe, if your lucky, you'll get a director or a producer). The point is to be seen, be seen, be seen...okay, got it?) Now it is not unusual for some showcases to request money to pay for the evening, maybe $ 30 - $ 100. This one however, quoted me a price considerably higher. So, I thought, I'll go to the callback, at least meet the casting director, and then go home and do my stuff. Well, I went, and they wanted me to do the showcase. Now, admittedly this showcase is like no other, it is run like a contest, along with numerous acting categories (and a ton of other things, singing, dancing, etc.), and includes free seminars for the entire weekend. They wine and dine the industry attending and hopefully get you, the performer some much needed exposure. So, when they approached me to compete, and gave me a "professional price" I thought seriously about it. I mean if just the one right person sees you, then that could be the real beginning! The problem is, the money wasn't just eating a whole in my pocket, it would've had to come out of money already allotted for other things like, oh I don't know, bills! And on top of that, there is an old saying in Hollywood, and I am paraphrasing, but it's along the lines of "You shouldn't have to pay to be seen..." It is a warning to newcomers that companies that charge a fee to see you, usually aren't on the up and up. I am by no means condemning the showcase, I just decided it wasn't the right thing for me to do.
ADVICE: Please, please, please, check the backgrounds of any company that just doesn't sit right with your gut. You never know. The Better Business Bureau is easy to find on the internet!
So, after all that hemming and hawing, I did manage to get some extra hours in at work this weekend, since I didn't have to be at the play. Plus, I got to rent some movies that I've been wanting to see...The Rookie was one of them. I just wanted to share a quote from that movie with you, please forgive me if it is not perfect...
"It's okay to talk about what you want to do, until it's time to start doing what you were meant to do." Although this could be taken many ways, I find that it can be positive if you look at it as a way of recognizing what it is you were meant to do, your purpose.
Okay, that's all I can think of right now. I hope this finds you all well and I will write to you next week!
September 24, 2002
Okay, so it's TUESDAY!!! I actually tried to write Sunday because it seemd I had so much to share from the week. So I went to log on Sunday and I couldn't get into my website. Obviously the problem is now solved, but that's my excuse (as valid as it is, it is an excuse!). So, what, you say, has been happening for the last week? As always, the play took most of my time this past weekend. LA Times came on Saturday night, which I think was the best show of the weekend. Whether or not we'll get a good review, who knows, but we, as a cast felt good, and that's about all we can do! Other people's opinions will continue to be that, OTHER people's opinions!So Monday I continued the search for work. I had an interview for a possible job on Wednesday. (I'm actually coming from the second interview now...we'll see!) Unfortunately no auditions this week. So, I spent a lot of time addressing postcards for the play (including the good review I received from BackStage West). I sent many postcards to casting agents, but also to producers and directors. (And in case you're wondering, you can get all kinds of incredible information and addresses in the Ross Reports. They come out once a month and give a full production (television and film) list for Los Angeles and New York!) So, maybe some people will come see me and think I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread and then I'll be a big and famous actress! What?! That's not how it happens? Well, I'm living my dreams, I might as well dream while I'm here, right? Miracles do happen!!!!
Probably the best thing of the week was Thursday night when I attended the premiere screening of a Showtime film entitled "Conviction," the true life story of Carl Upchurch. Omar Epps starred and was fantastic. Dana Delany (a Wesleyan alum) also starred in the film. She was great too. The premiere was good, met some important folk at Showtime which may prove useful one day. It was nice to see Dana again (I met her in 1998 at a Wesleyan function) - just to reiterate the connection. To those reading this that are trying to learn a little about "the game," it is always in your best interest to record when you meet someone, where and why, and maybe even what you talk about. It helps to jog someone's memory to remind them, as well as prove to them that you don't forget meeting someone as important as them!!! (Get it?) So, when I saw Dana, I was able to remind her exactly where I met her and when. Then she said she thought I looked familiar! See how it works? She's incredibly kind, by the way, in case you're wondering. She was very encouraging about my acting and writing career and even gave me a few more alumni to contact!!! Aaaahh the game.
One of the things that I took with me from the premiere is something I wanted to share with you immediately, but since I wanted to have something to say, I saved it and remembered it for now. "What is it?" you say? You can't wait? You're dying of curiosity? Well, some of you may have already heard this, but I hadn't. And I hate to say it, but it's funny and true. It is wisdom shared with me by Avi Hearn, a writer and producer for Showtime. He asked me if I knew the five stages of an actor. I said no, expecting to hear something about method acting, or something along those lines. Then he said, "Now you can insert any actor's name..." So I will use mine.
Stage 1: "Who is Nafeesa Monroe?"
Stage 2: "Get me Nafeesa Monroe!" Stage 3: "Get me a Nafeesa Monroe type!" Stage 4: "Get me a young Nafeesa Monroe!" Stage 5: "Who the hell is Nafeesa Monroe?" Although I am still in Stage 1, I feel Stage 2 is right around the corner! And with that, I leave you. Until next week. Don't forget to laugh. Laughter is often the best medicine, specially designed by the all knowing energy of life!
P.S. Tomorrow is Christopher Reeve's 50th Birthday. I mention this because you can send him a birthday card at ChristopherReeve.com and they will receive a dollar per card sent (from an anonymous donor.) The money goes to spinal cord injury research. Check it out if it interests you, or better yet, send him a birthday card!
Okay, now I'm really leaving....
September 15, 2002
Another Sunday afternoon of rest after two exhausting nights of the play. Tonight is the last night for the weekend and is usually the show for which I'm most fatigued. I think I really realized the amount of energy this play takes out of me every night. My weekends are calm during the day, and I'm still exhausted at the end of the night. That's how it's supposed to be I guess! I treat the weekends like the time that I spent in New York doing Off Off Broadway (around this time last year.) When one is actually being PAID to do theatre (which is rare in LA if you're not in the big theatres), that's all one does. That's your job, right? In New York, our show ran Wed. - Sun, and that's all I was supposed to do. I didn't have to wake up in the morning to go to another job, the play WAS my job. That is one of the best feelings I've ever had. I wasn't getting rich off of the show, mind you, but my housing and food were well taken care of. Anyway, so the weekends for me now are about the play, it is my job, even though I'm not getting paid. The play is what we call an Equity Waiver play. Equity is the theatre actors union, so because we have a waiver, it means we have professional actors that have agreed to work essentially for free. This is the way of most theatre in Los Angeles.Okay, so this week, what has happened this week? Now, I've been debating on whether or not to share this, but I decided I will since the point of this journal is for everyone to get a sense of what it is truly like pursuing a career as an actor here in Los Angeles. It's not easy, and anyone who professes to the opposite is lying. The truth is, it's probably one of the most difficult careers to pursue. One reason is that it's hard, unless of course you're independently wealthy, to find a job that is willing to pay you enough for you to survive comfortably AND that is willing to give you flexibility to get to auditions, and work the occassional acting job while you're waiting for your big break. So money becomes an incredible issue. Without it, you are screwed, no headshots, no resumes, no acting class, no gas in your car, and maybe even no car (not to mention little things like food, clothing, and a roof over your head!). But with a job that pays well, chances are you won't be able to make it to some of your auditions, and maybe won't be able to take a three to five day job if you get one! Now to some, this may sound senseless, since those of us out here living this life, are chasing our dreams (for that we are blessed) and yes, there are many different life paths we could have chosen, and why struggle so? Well, for those that choose not to, they soon leave this pursuit. And I will admit I have quit acting about once a year for each of my ten years here. But I am a strong believer in purpose, and that each of us has a purpose in life (these words inspired by Locksley Geoghagen, one of my best friends, Dr. Wayne Dyer, and Deepak Chopra). Although I'm in and out about my true purpose, I do know that at some level I am to tell stories. It's all I've ever really done, and what I've always done best. Whether they be written, performed in a play, or read as poetry, my life has been about sharing stories. So, with that in mind, I figure I can heal and teach among other things through my stories...and somehow, most days, that makes the struggle bearable. Plus, I am incredibly blessed to have the continued support of my mother, my boyfriend, and my friends. Okay, so where am I going with all this blabbering? Well, this week, I spent a lot of time looking for another job that would support my acting needs in addition to my human needs. I hope to take the CBEST soon (the test for California teachers) so I can register to do some substitute teaching. In the meantime I've been looking for work as a tutor, or an assistant to a writer, director, or producer (which could give me another perspective on the whole movie making business). We'll see what manifests itself. In the meantime, I'm trying to keep my options open.
No auditions to report this week. Maybe next week.
I hope you all are well. Until next Sunday....
September 8, 2002
It is Sunday afternoon and I am trying to rest before my show tonight. For those of you that don't know, this weekend is opening weekend for For the Love of Freedon, the play I've been in intense rehearsal for since July! So, this week I did nothing but that. Although last week I was slightly upset about not booking the TV show I auditioned for, I realized in the middle of this week I could not have done both; the television show would have filmed this week during the day! It just goes to show, there are no coincidences...everything is meant to be! This week was long, trying, and intense. I almost lost my voice several times, and am still nursing it for fear of losing it in the middle of the show. And although rehearsal is primarily over, and the play is up and running, and I think I'll be so happy to have nothing to do this week, I know I'll miss having to be at rehearsal every day. But isn't that the way of life? At least it is for me. There is a good part of me, that no matter how tired I may be, enjoys extremely hard work. It is rewarding. I am still looking for the key to "work smarter, not harder," but until then, hard work will have to suffice. Last night, the actresses Tisha Campbell Martin and Tichina Arnold came to see the show and they were raving. I don't want to say I was surprised, but definitely flattered. They are both so kind and generous, it's always a pleasure to meet successful actors such as they.So the play is off and running and now I am faced with "what do I do during the week?" I have a lot of writing to do, so I will get started on that, but as for tomorrow, I will rest. I will not leave the house. I will watch every movie in my collection and be lazy on the couch. At least for one day!
And don't forget, if you want to see the play and will be in LA, we run until October 20th, every Friday, Saturday and Sunday. I will be performing every weekend except September 27th, 28th, and 29th. For more info, contact the Greenway Court Theatre (323) 655-7679
....Well, it is several hours later, but still Sunday. I am just returning home from the play. I felt my performance was really on tonight (it's rare that I feel that way), but as a whole, I think the show kind of dragged. But guess who showed up tonight and loved it...Beverly Todd, the model / actress, as well as some of the behind the scenes folk from the television show My Wife and Kids. I used to stand-in for Tisha Campbell Martin (rehearse her moves for camera and lighting and such) in their first season. Now, one of the other actresses in the play is her stand-in, and all these folks from the show came out to support us. Isn't that cool? Thank you to all of them.
On another note, I was driving home thinking about what else happened this week that I forgot to write about and I remembered some good news that I wanted to share. As most of you may know, I recently released a spoken word CD of my poetry, produced by none other than Gagnez LeJeu. Well, thanks to him, we found several places to make the CD available online, one of which is CDBaby.com. Well, a few short days after they received my product, they decided to feature it on the front page of their website because they enjoyed it so much! Talk about flattery! Well, I say all this to say that they continue to be the bearer of good news. Now, they have chosen me, along with about 20 (I think) other independent artists, to be a part of their CDBaby Magazine AND the CDBaby Compilation album, which is sent out to EVERYONE who buys a CD from them... for a three month period. Isn't that incredible? Well, I think it is. Thank you CDBaby for the love. I hope I continue to remain deserving of it! When the magazine is out, I'll let y'all know (October I think...). And then, if you buy anything (including my CD) from CDBaby, you'll receive it with your order.
Okay, I didn't intend this to be a plug, I was just excited about the good news and wanted to share it. So now I will retire to the bed! Woohoo! Sleep! I can't believe it! You all get your rest and stay healthy. Until next Sunday....
September 2, 2002
Well, again, it is Monday, not Sunday, but this is my first chance to write in the last two days. This week, all in all was a good week, but I am glad I get to rest today! Let's see, oh yes, last week Monday, I went in to meet with my agent in the valley. We had a great meeting about the things I am looking to do with my acting career, how she can help, and what other things I can do to make it happen. See I came to LA to act in film. For some people, their film career just naturally develops, but for me, the majority of my paid acting work has been for television sitcoms. Now, don't get me wrong, work is work, and I'm thankful for it, I just want to expand and attempt to head in the direction that I originally intended to go. Anyway, so we're discussing how to do that, then the fact that I need new headshots...(again!) and then the phone rings. My agent answers the phone, writes down some info, and then hangs up, looks at me, and says, "This interview is for you!" Woohoo! An audition! So Tuesday I had an audition for the television show "One on One."Now, for those of you that don't know, there are several levels of work as an actor on a television sitcom (and the pay changes accordingly). The highest level is a Regular, meaning that you are on the show every week, in the opening credits, and so on...you are paid extremely well in most cases; the next level down is Recurring, meaning you are on more than one episode in a season, but not every single one; then is a Guest Star, you have a major role in that ONE episode; next is a Co-Star, you have a small role in that one episode (usually 5 lines or less); then there are the Background Actors (some call them Extras) who do not speak at all, just walk by, or sit in the background. Now, if you read my resume, you will see all my work on TV has been as a Co-Star. This is not bad, only stagnating. After a certain point one wants to reach the level of Guest Star, where casting directors see that you can carry a larger part. This transition is not always easy to make, in fact it usually is not easy.
Anyhow, the point of all this is to say that my audition was for a Guest Star role!!! So I go in Tuesday morning to read and get called back right away for a producers session later that day (meaning the producers of the show will be at the next reading). This, as small as it may seem, is a huge leap, because finally a casting director believes I might have what it takes to handle a Guest Star role! The producers session went well, but I did not get called back later that day to read with the lead actor on the show. Of course I later found out that they had people like Jasmine Guy (people with a "name") also reading for this role. So I was a little disappointed, but proud of myself for going that far.
Then, two days later I get another call from my agent, and the same show wants me to come back to read for a co-star role! Okay, I can do that, since this shows that they like me! And like I said, work is work. So I read for the Co-Star role and afterwards the casting director gave me an incredible compliment. So, all in all, I did not get any of the parts, but I made a new contact with this particular casting director, which is a positive accomplishment.
And of course, my rehearsals for Dessalines have been ongoing in the evenings. This weekend we did what's called "tech," which means we set all the lights and sounds and organize the cues (which lights and sounds will be on when.) It is a long tedious process that requires incredible patience. We all survived and are now ready to run the play with costumes and lights and get into a rhythm for opening night this Friday! By the way, there are still seats available for Saturday and Sunday this weekend if you'd like to join in on the fun. The number for reservations is (323) 655-7679 extension 3. All other info is on my Upcoming Acting page. I do hope to see some of you. But if you can't make it, don't wish me luck, tell me to "Break a leg!"
August 25, 2002
Well, I'm in currently in an eight hour rehearsal for Dessalines. My entire week has pretty much consisted of rehearsal and trying to get over this cold, or virus that I came down with Monday night. It seems to be getting worse instead of better. I'm hoping to do some healing on our long awaited day off of rehearsal tomorrow.I did have one audition this week with a casting director I had not yet met. Those auditions are always good, even if you don't get the part, because if they like you, chances are, now that they've seen you once, they'll call you in on other projects. It was a good audition, a funny moment. I'm pretty sure I didn't get the part, but I know I did well, and that's all I can ask for! Besides, isn't there some law about the number of rejections one needs in order to not get rejected? Okay, maybe it's not so for everyone, but for many.
I also had a short poetry performance (just 2 poems) for an event called the Fiery Feminist Freedom Fest. Thank you to Cheryl for inviting me, and for all the others who shared their words, including my LBC teammate Rachel Kann. I didn't get to stay to see everyone because I ducked out of rehearsal to be there, but I'm sure they all rocked. It's nice to perform in a more intimate space where people are not equating a number with your words, just listening to them. It was a nice post-nationals appearance, with an attentive audience.
So the week ends as I look forward to a day of rest and healing. All my best to you all. Stay focussed on your dreams.
August 19, 2002
Well, technically it's Monday, but I had no internet contact for the last week, and am just now able to write. So, why, you ask, did I have no internet contact? Well, because I was at the National Poetry Slam in Minneapolis, Minnesota. I went as a member of the Long Beach Team (R.A.C., Buddy Wakefield, Rachel Kann, and Michael Cirelli fill out the team, not forgetting our coach Mindy Nettifee and our incredible friend Ben Trigg!). It was an intense week to say the least. The truth is, Slam is supposed to be fun, a gathering of poets from across the country, a friendly competition with random judges chosen nightly. One should never judge one's ability as a poet by how well one fares in a slam. That being said...it takes a strong person to not feel bad about losing a bout, or getting a low score on their best poem.Our first night, we faced New York City's Bar 13 team, a team of incredibly talented poets and performers, Marty McConnell, Lynne Procope, Bassey (I can't remember her last name...), and Bonafide. All of whom I had befriended in my short stay in NY last year. They rocked, but we, however, rocked a little harder, and to our... (surprise is not the right word here, but I can't seem to find another), uh, excitement we, Long Beach took the bout. Our next night we lost as a result of time penalties (one of which was mine...) to New York City's Urbana, with a fiesty team including Celena Glen, Big George McGibbons (aka R.A.C. McGibbons), Taylor Mali, and Shappy. But, after my long faced night, I was elated to discover we had still qualified for the semi-finals!
In semi's, we went up against Urbana (AGAIN!!!), Providence, and Houston. This round, there were no time penalties, just a bad draw (meaning we went absolutely first), some luke-warm judges, and ultimately, a decent group piece from Urbana, which sealed their victory.
Now here is the place where I come clean. I, Nafeesa, am a sore loser. I am often too competitive, and take competition entirely too seriously, especially poetry slams! I admit to immediately leaving the bout after it was clear we had come in 2nd, not even staying to watch the rest of the teams compete. At the time, however, I didn't feel I could hold back my disappointment. My goodness, we were so close, less than a point behind! I'm not saying it was right, but I, like many, am not perfect.
I have calmed down considerably now, and am proud of our team's performance. Not to mention the other Los Angeles poets who made waves in the individual competition, Gina Loring placed 6th, Rives from Los Feliz placed 4th, and our very own Sekou (tha Misfit) placed 1st!!!! in the nation! Long Beach did end up with a rank of 6th in the nation, out of 56 teams. Not bad!
So my sulking is done, at least for now. Thank you to Beausia, an incredible poet from NY, but now in San Francisco, who offered up the advice of being content within oneself; being proud of your own work, not allowing the judges decision to alter your opinion of yourself or your work. Good advice. I am, however, reconsidering slamming next year, it might do me good to go as a spectator... And now I am back into swing with the playground of my life in LA. Happy to see my boyfriend, and working on being ready for rehearsal tomorrow night. Desslines opens in just two weeks!
My best to every one. And let your super-b, be superb... even if you can't always do it, try and do it sometimes. Eventually it will become habit!
August 11, 2002
Another week has gone by and my head is spinning. Tomorrow I and the rest of the Long Beach National Poetry Slam Team take off for Minneapolis to compete against 60 something teams from across the country. We have our work cut out for us! So I am spending my last few hours in LA packing and getting my life settled.This week started with an audition on Tuesday for a show called "Blunt." I had to rap! At first I thought "I am not a rapper! I'm a poet!" But in the end I think I did okay. It's a sketch comedy show where they will break out rapping occassionally. I went with a little of a bad attitude, but left feeling like I did the best I could, and glad that I went. One rule in Hollywood, always take the meeting, or at least the audition. You may not do the project, or get the part, but the people you meet may like you and you may run into them again. So, I'm glad I went.
Thursday night was the Long Beach Team's last fundraiser at A Mic and Dim Lights in Pamona, hosted by Besskepp. We raised a little money and had a great time. That venue has so much love, it's incredible.
And the rest of the week was filled with rehearsals for Dessalines. The hardest thing about a play set in 1802 is the research required on how people walked, ate, carried themselves in that time period. Especially in Haiti, some were very influenced by the French tradition, others fought to remain African. It is an interesting, ongoing journey. More on that soon.
So today I prepare for tomorrow. I will try and write from Minneapolis, but if not, then when I return. Wish Long Beach luck. My best to all of you.